Cause and Effect

I have never been a proponent of the idea that there is always a clearly defined and discernable cause and effect for any event, action, and so on. Too many variables, known and unknown, tend to cloud the calculus to trust the results absolutely. I believe in chaos, albeit a limited chaos – similarly, I believe in finite freedom of the will but that is an arcane theological issue concerning eschatology and faith – that clouds the judgment and disallows a purely empirical assessment of primal cause and ultimate effect.

Science is largely built on logical detached observation: its central article of faith is (relatively) objective observation. Heisenburg drilled holes in that supposition when he noted that the presence of an observer changes the experiment. What we know we have either reasoned out by having criticized the observation and established the relative predictability of a result to a given action. Ultimately, however, we don’t know. We trust in experience and in the maxims that describe the experience of others that have made similar observation. Our experience, while not absolute, allows existential certainty that a predictable result will follow a known cause. I let go of an object and it will fall toward earth: gravitation is observed and works. One might argue that the elemental forces of nature are immutable, perhaps even absolute. One might be correct in the assertion that an object dropped will always fall in the presence of gravity, or even that both objects will move toward each other in a manner that reflects the mass of either. But one cannot absolutely prove this, whether for fault of language or experience the possibility remains that it may not be so, however infinitesimal that possibility may be.

The human heart is a whole other thing. It has a logic all its own that defies simple cause/effect relationships. Why should this be? Are not our emotions the results of a physiological response to a stimulus? I hear a phrase or see an event. My brain processes that event and responds, based on its programming: the sum of my experience and the value system inculcated into that heart and mind. I hear that my wife wants a divorce and my heart breaks, as it has on two occasions. My daughter tells me she loves me and I feel a “warmth” that is simply ineffable. A car cuts across my path while cycling – as happened today – and I feel anxiety followed by relief. These are predictable. It is the events of the heart and mind that defy prediction which are difficult.

This brings me to my real concern today. I remain confused by the depth of emotion that I feel and the way that this seems only to intensify as I grow closer to 50 years of age. Jung once postulated that NTs (intuitive thinkers) become more feeling and sense oriented as they age, as if the psyche is seeking a balance. The same is true for other types, SJs (sensing judgers) become more imaginative and willing to let things be open, and so on. This is difficult for me as I am painfully aware that emotions pass, but the havoc that they can create remains long after the feelings have dissipated into the mist.

As an NT, I have always looked for order, even an order that is predicated upon chaos – I am intuitive, my mind can be wrapped around that idea – and I fear that this has been a quest that will never be completed. There is a part of me that has always felt that it is the journey, not the destination that causes the sailor to cast of the dock-lines. I have never felt that there is an ultimate meaning to life – Westminister Catechism be damned – and that we are not blessed with the vision to see beyond the context of our lives. Thus, all observations are by their nature narrow and parochial, subject to revision and in need of constant correction, or not ( I have to leave that possibility open, if I am to be an honest fool).

The problem with any strong emotion is that once it is past you are left with results that you could not have predicted because the chaos of the human heart and mind is greater than the ability to reason forces of nature.

Ah, but I am only a fool…

The Great Wall of Bush

Have you ever heard the old joke about Mexican Olympic atheletes? Why has Mexico never won a gold metal in the summer games? Because any of us that can run, swim, or jump are already here! I can tell that joke, being Mexican. A white guy tells it and it becomes racist. Double standards... I doubt that we will ever outgrow them. Speaking of double standards, here it the summary of a bill signed today by "W" proposing that we partition the southern border of these United States.

109th CONGRESS
1st Session
H. R. 4083
To direct the
Secretary of Homeland Security to construct a fence along the southern border of
the United States.
IN THE HOUSE OF REPRESENTATIVES
October 19, 2005

Mr. GOODE (for himself, Mr. HUNTER, Mr. GINGREY, Mr. HAYWORTH, Mr. ROGERS of Alabama, Ms. FOXX, Mr. BARRETT of South Carolina, Mr. JONES of North Carolina, Mr. GARRETT of New Jersey, Mr. TANCREDO, Mr. NORWOOD, Mr. DEAL of Georgia, Mr. DAVIS of Kentucky, Mr. SULLIVAN, Mr. BROWN of South Carolina, Mr. WILSON of South Carolina, Mr. SAM JOHNSON of Texas, Mr. CULBERSON, Mr. POE, Mr. CARTER, Mr. ROHRABACHER, Mr. RADANOVICH, Mr. HOSTETTLER, Mr. SESSIONS, and Mr. KING of Iowa) introduced the following bill; which was referred to the Committee on Homeland Security

A BILL

To direct the Secretary of Homeland Security to construct
a fence along the southern border of the United States.
Be it enacted by the Senate and House of Representatives of the United States of America in Congress
assembled,

SECTION 1. SHORT TITLE.

This Act may be cited as the `Border Security Improvement Act'.

SEC. 2. CONSTRUCTION OF FENCE ON SOUTHERN BORDER.

Section 102 of the Illegal Immigration Reform and Immigrant Responsibility Act of 1996 (8 U.S.C. 1103 note) is amended--

(1) by striking `Attorney General' each place such term appears and inserting `Secretary of Homeland Security';

(2) by redesignating subsections (c) and (d) as subsections (d) and (e), respectively;

(3) in subsection (b), by striking `subsection (d)),' and inserting `subsection (e)),'; and

(4) by inserting after subsection (b) the following:`(c) Construction of Fence on Southern Border-

`(1) IN GENERAL- In carrying out subsection (a), the Secretary of Homeland Security shall provide for the construction of a fence along the entire southern border of the United States.

`(2) AUTHORIZATION OF APPROPRIATIONS- There are authorized to be appropriated $2,000,000,000 to carry out paragraph (1).'.

And my longstanding question remains... how many hungry children could be fed with $2,000,000,000? Are strawberrys and inexpensive labor for jobs that we really don't want to do anyway presenting that much of a risk to National Security? To tell you the truth, were I to enter the United States for nefarious purposes, I'd cross at Niagra Falls. If I were trying to do so clandestinely I might drop myself offshore and enter on either coast.

But we'll have our own fence...



But I am only a fool...

What Can One Person Do?

It feels self-indulgent to be writing about weight loss when the world has decided to take itself to hell in a hand basket. Anybody that knows me knows that my mind is generally working on more than one level. I think in terms of both the macrocosm and microcosm. All things in an organic system are tied together in a cause-effect relationship. Think about it: cancer begins as one cell. Healing can begin with one person. No, I am no megalomaniac: I have a healthy ego, but it is not that swelled. I believe that we are more powerful than we believe.

There are two basic mistakes that one can make cycling. Pick too big a gear, pick too small a gear. Put more plainly it is to overestimate or underestimate ability, capacity, resources, and so on. I’ve made the same errors riding. Pull too small a gear on a hill and your legs spin out, pull too big a gear and your legs burn out. I’ve done this as recently as miles 60-70 on the last century I rode. What I needed to know is realistically what I could do. I needed to know what I could and could not do. I needed to know my strengths and my weaknesses.

So what does this have to do with the systematic dismantling of civil liberties, the harm that the current administration is doing to the environment, the disparity between the rich and the poor? It means that I have incredible power to effect change. So do you. The greatest error is not to risk the life-change that is required to make change. It is a funny thing: The only way that I learned my limitations was to force myself to my physical resources end. I was so damn tired that I could hardly stand. I wondered, when was the last time I was so damn tired from the struggle for peace and justice that I could hardly stand. There was a time that I was not only an endurance athlete, but deeply involved in the struggle to make the world a better place by making my little corner into a better place altogether.

Once cell can begin a cancer that leads to the death of the organism; one person can begin the change that heals the world. I have an errand to run. I’ll take my bike rather than driving and save a bit of gas, get some exercise, and – almost as a side effect – do that small bit to heal the planet. It may be just a bit, but great things are made of such small bits.

Ah, but I am only a fool…

One Hundred and Two Miles

There are times that a goal which is distance needs to have milestones, way-markers that allow a person to see progress toward a goal that is too distant to comprehend. For me, losing nearly sixty pounds is a goal that is too large to comprehend. Just losing weight can be easily accomplished. But that is really not the goal. The goal is good physical health. That means a change in lifestyle. Food, my favorite vice, needs to be seen differently. I can’t use food as comfort. I can enjoy my food, but I cannot become a glutton. Equally the word “exercise” had fallen out of my lexicon. It has to become part of lifestyle.

So, to make an attainable goal I decided to ride a century. That is one-hundred miles on my little bike. I did it, with a caveat. I rode over 100 miles, but did not complete the course. I took a wrong turn that resulted in my taking about 20 miles more than I should have before the second to last rest-stop. I found the second to last and realized that I should have been at 65 miles and was at 87. That would mean that I would ride over twenty miles over the distance of the century plus the 15 mile round trip to and from the staging area. I decided to use the SAG vehicle for the last part of the ride. Now, my 87 plus 15 was 102 miles. It was a century, but not the century that was defined.

I am doing it again in February. I made several mistakes on this ride. The Harvest Ride for Literacy was a course marked by serious hills (Category 1 Climbs: >5% grade for 6-12 miles). This was not a good “first century”. The worst of the hills were between miles 60 and 70. They really knocked the wind out of my sails. I truly believe that I could have finished the course, but would still be recovering from the physical stress placed on my body. I under-trained, especially on hills. In the past I was an excellent climber. At 6’1” and 185 pounds I could leg-press 650 to 700 pounds, on a bet I once got 800 pounds up (and never want to do that again!). Needless to say, hills were not an issue. I did serious weight work to get that power in my gams. Now I am not in a gym but am wondering about running and jump-rope.

What is the point of all of this athletic nonsense? It has to do with discipline to make a change in life. I am committed to this change, as I am to others. Riding a century is a metaphor for other achievement. Do you know how to ride a century? It is really simple. Get on the bike and turn the pedals for 100 miles, approximately 31,875 times at 85 rpm.

Ah, but I am only a more toned and thinner – 228 pounds! – fool!